If only my child came with an instruction manual!
When we brought our tiny newborn twins home from the hospital ten years ago, I would have dearly loved to have an instruction manual packed alongside the nappies and Bonds Wondersuits.
If not an instruction manual, maybe just a fuel gauge so I could work out when they were hungry and when they were full, or a step-by-step guide to guarantee a full night’s sleep. Alas, no babies of mine ever arrived with an instruction manual.
Perhaps parents of teenagers feel the same. Questions we might ask are:
How do I handle the anxieties and worries that come out at night time?
What should I do about access to social media?
Why do we have the same friendship issues year after year?
Just what is TikTok? I thought it was a biscuit!
Raising children in the 21st century is certainly a complex task. Parents might wonder why their teenager is reluctant to talk about problems they are experiencing online.
A recent report on internet safety from the UK highlights some key issues that our community faces concerning internet use . This research shows that while 77% of teenagers would like help from a trusted adult when they experience problems online, many are reluctant to ask for help. Teenagers may often fear that if they raise an issue they might get into trouble, have their phone taken away from them or have their social media use more closely monitored. Many teenagers may also fear the repercussions of getting someone else into trouble.
In Assembly on Tuesday, I encouraged students to carefully consider both the opportunities that technology offers as well as some of the risks we find in online communities. Students were challenged to consider their role in creating safe online spaces, where kindness and compassion guide both words and actions.
So what can parents do to encourage safe and respectful behaviour online? It’s a complex question and it will look different for every family. Some helpful ideas include:
Be informed. There is a great deal of quality, practical information for parents concerning technology, adolescence and well-being. The following sites are an excellent place to start:
Be open. Seek to keep the lines of communication open concerning your child and their experiences online. If you feel panicky or distressed about what your child tells you, try to listen, understand and respond in a way that is proactive in resolving a situation and protecting your child from future difficulty.
Ask for help. As a community, we partner together to support, guide and educate young people in all aspects of life. If you are concerned about your child’s well-being in any way, please do not hesitate to contact either me, your child’s Head of Year or our School Counsellor, Mrs Julia Willoughby.
Stelle Carmichael – Head of Students