Communication has become a topic of conversation in my home recently.
Many a time, I have gone to speak to a family member who is in the room only to be met by a stony silence. The silence is not rudeness but, as I quickly discover, the result of connection to devices. At times it has gotten to the point of being quite comical as I ask a question or strike up a conversation, seemingly speaking to a void.
With wireless earbuds, people can appear to be present and ready for conversation whilst being absorbed in a world of music, stories and podcasts. Lesson number one for me was that physical presence does not indicate ‘presence’ in that deeper sense. It is so easy to lose some of that wonderful spontaneous interactions that makes up family life.
As parents and teachers, we are increasingly aware that the world we thought we inhabited has changed. The ability that we had, when our children were younger, to manage their reading, listening and viewing changed as they grew. When my own children were young, my wife and I conscientiously reviewed their reading matter and checked films for content that was inappropriate for our children’s age. We were conscious of views of the world that conflicted with our faith and values as a family and, by-and-large, we could successfully navigate this through conversations and selections.
“... we can embrace the opportunities for connection that these platforms provide but we must be mindful of the value of face-to-face connection and conversation. ”
It quickly became evident that our grown and adult children inhabit a world that is very hyper-individualised in terms of the ability to follow their own media interests and, at the same time, being hyper-connected through the social media platforms that they can access. As families, we can embrace the opportunities for connection that these platforms provide but we must be mindful of the value of face-to-face connection and conversation.
When our children were younger, we could sit and watch a movie or show together and discuss how characters were presented and what point they were trying to make. We could have those vital conversations about how that connected to our understanding of God and His desires for us. Now, we need to open the conversation to encourage them to use their discernment built over years of time invested, to think about what they are seeing and listening to, and to make wise decisions. Encouraging our children to be reflective individuals is an important step in their growth.
This releasing of our young people to make wise choices is part of the maturing process but it does not mean that we as a family cannot continue to set our own parameters and expectations. In a sense, we create our own family cultures that, whilst interacting with the world around us, should not be beholden to it.
As a School, we are keen to work with you to ensure that we are developing thoughtful young people who are not mere sponges, unthinking absorbers of the world around them but rather, discerning young people, with a clear understanding of who they are, able to make profoundly life affirming decisions. At Calvin Christian School, we have expectations of ‘presence’ and ‘engagement’ in lessons, learning and relationships. We have conversations about faith, values and discernment. And we will make decisions about age and stage-appropriate content. I look forward to continuing this conversation with you as we partner with you to raise strong young men and women of character.
Scott Ambrose — Principal